mayachain: (spn Family)
[personal profile] mayachain

Title: Stairway from Nowhere
Author: [livejournal.com profile] ms_jvh_shuh
Genre: Gen
Rating: R
Word Count: 1247
Spoilers: nothing specific for season 3
Summary: "There is blood left in the dirt in its trail, the stench of it tinged with smoke and fire. Its blind stumble is followed by the predators of a tree-filled place with wary eyes and offended noses, scenting bleeding and vulnerable but not prey, wrong."
Note: So I decided to try something a bit experimental. A warm thank you to my betas, [livejournal.com profile] just_ruth and [livejournal.com profile] maras_morgue!



Stairway from Nowhere


01

It doesn't know where it is, who it is, how it is, coming to be in this different realm through an eerily Stonehenge-like formation of solid rock feet pounding, running, running.

There is blood left in the dirt in its trail, the stench of it tinged with smoke and fire. Its blind stumble is followed by the predators of a tree-filled place with wary eyes and offended noses, scenting bleeding and vulnerable but not prey, wrong.

It is running, running, it doesn't know where or how or where to, doesn't know anything but away and somewhere to find something.

April 23 2010, 12:01


02

It is running, running, somewhere to find something and away. Its skin is raw; there are many places on its running body where there is no skin left at all. No skin, only patches of open, exposed, red meat, half crusted with blood, red liquid trickling out.

Its left hip and right shoulder are burnt almost black, ugly marks left on its body by fire it can remember nothing about. It is running, running, it is not in that place anymore and it doesn't care if it's managed to trick them or if they let it go on purpose.

April 23 2010, 16:14


03

It is running, running, and it doesn't know where to, only knows the urge deep within its bones to find whatever it is, the whatever something that's the only reason it could leave the fire-filled place, its whatever something that's the only reason it is out and... maybe... alive.

Bloody feet cover distance after distance of the tree-filled place, but eventually it has to admit that the whatever something it is searching for is not, cannot be here. It halts to stand still for a moment, breathing hard, squinting, trying to gauge the best way out of the trees.

April 24 2010, 19:03


04

It is running, running even faster than before, faking courage to leave the trees behind. Everything is too bright, too loud, its eyes hurt and it can barely see. The enormity of open space is frightening, a black broad line cutting through the vastness the only sense-making thing.

There are monsters rushing by on the path, too loud, too fast, and it thinks they're going somewhere.

It doesn't matter how scared it is, they're going somewhere and it has to follow them. It keeps running, running, confused by sounds and sights and smells its mind cannot comprehend.

April 25 2010, 7:48


05

It is running, running, away from the trees and into the realm of shadow-beings, taller and darker than the occasional animal it met in the tree-filled place. It knows that the whatever something it's searching for resembles them as soon as it spots the first, a little like the Others in the flame-filled place but not broken, more whole.

One of them might know where its whatever something is, but there are so many of them hurrying along the pavement, and it is too scared of hollow gazes being laid upon it that it doesn't dare to ask for directions.

April 25 2010, 13:21


06

It is running, running, distance after distance among the shadows, afraid that they will see it, but they don't. Many a time one comes near it, but their eyes slide over it, no sign of recognition.

The realm of the shadow-beings is very different from the flame-filled place. It gets the feeling that it can run a long distance and not be harmed, here. Its injuries, so much graver than those of disabled shadows it sees don't seem to matter like they should.

Without its something, however, it will remain helpless, alone, so it keeps running, running.

April 26 2010, 9:15


07

It is running, running, looking for its something among the shadows, halting sometimes to size them up as they pass by, mind filled with confusion. Yes, its something looks like the shadows, but the shadows come in so many sizes and it cannot decide if its something is supposed to feel smaller or bigger under its hands.

It yearns to find it, touch it, and it knows it is no shadow itself, but maybe it will find its something sooner if it tries to be like them. So it eats, like it watches the shadows do, stuffs its face with leaves and dirt, feeling no hunger, no thirst, no pain.

April 27 2010, 17:26


08

It is running, running, another distance when there's a loud sound and cold liquid starts dripping from the sky, drips into its wounds.

Whimpering, soaked and terrified, it wishes its something were there with it, it's supposed to be big, could give it shelter, could hold it and tell it why it needs to find it, what it means and why, why they've been apart.

Somehow, at least, its skin and the no-skin-at-all places feel better after the liquid stops, there is less blood and it is maybe a little bit cleaner.

April 28 2010, 4:32


09

It is starting to feel that is has not stopped, has not rested since it escaped the flames many distances ago. The realm of shadow-beings is wet from the liquid, its running feet find the pavement muddy and slippery.

It has not found its something yet, maybe it won't, it doesn't want to think that it might not and it is running, running away from the evil hopeless thought, too fast, too fast the ground wet from the liquid and -

The instant it lands in the dirt, face down, it knows something is different.

April 28 2010, 14:48


10

It is lying on the ground, hurting and hopeless and no longer invisible.

The shadows can see it. The shadows can see it; it tries to get up but the shadows are shouting at it and at each other, harsh words it cannot understand and closing in.

It raises its hands to protect its head, protect its eyes, tries to scream, can only think away away away and has no way to realize, as it fades oh God oh God fades away from them, that the white flash is a zealous person's camera snapping a picture of it.

April 28 2010, 14:53


11

It is limping, lumbering, dragging its feet at snail speed when it cannot run another distance. It tries to be careful, but it loses control with every new terrifying hopeless thought; there are more and more distances with shadows gasping, shocked, surprised, seeing it.

It cannot count the distances. There have been so many, so many and it still hasn't spotted its something among the shadows, and maybe it will never find it but now it's being threatened, followed, stalked, there have been many distances but it knows, it knows it has seen the black monster before.

April 30 2010, 22:18


12

Its strength is at its end. It won't find its something, and it wants to stay here at the place with the trees, simply disappear again. It cannot run anymore, lies slumped against a strong, thick trunk, listening to and dreading thudding steps from behind.

All this effort and its escape was for nothing, it has been found, they'll take it back to the flames and no -

A hand, the barest touch to its unburned shoulder blade, hesitant and gentle. A voice, rough and filled with tears and disbelief and young, and when its Sammy speaks its name, it feels warm and amazing and whole.

May 2nd 2010, 11:59



- END -




Date: 2008-02-17 03:39 pm (UTC)
innie_darling: (dean has strong tendons)
From: [personal profile] innie_darling
A really interesting read - I thought it was Dean's soul making its way through hell, but I don't think that's it. Hmmm.

Date: 2008-02-19 06:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
I thought it was Dean's soul making its way through hell, but I don't think that's it.
No, the first scene is pretty much about not-quite-Dean-anymore getting out of hell. I was hoping the set up wouldn't be too confusing, but people reading different things into it should probably be expected...
Thanks for commenting!

Date: 2008-02-18 01:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] may7fic.livejournal.com
Wow, what a unique and fascinating story. I know that it's Dean but, in what version, is my question. I have to believe he's recognizable somehow for Sammy to find him. Still, you've left me wondering many things. And that's good.
Thank-you.
Edited Date: 2008-02-19 01:12 am (UTC)

spoiler for 3.09 below - warning!

Date: 2008-02-19 07:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
I know that it's Dean but, in what version, is my question.
I'm thinking about writing a follow-up that has Sam trying to figure that out. [3.09 spoiler]: , but as he himself knows, after about two years in hell he isn't exactly human anymore, either - else he couldn't make himself invisible, for one, and all those injuries he has would probably have killed him pretty fast.

Thanks for reading!

Re: spoiler for 3.09 below - warning!

Date: 2008-02-20 04:30 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] may7fic.livejournal.com
Oh, as much as I think the story was perfect as is, the idea of a continuation is so appealing. *I'm* certainly intrigued and, if you decide to go for it, I wish you all the best with it.

Now, for a totally off topic question... I'm still a relative novice at lj and am dying to know how you were able to "blank" out that spoiler. What code did you use, assuming you used one? please and thank-you? :D

whiteout spoiler coding

Date: 2008-02-20 11:42 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
*g* that was a first for me too, and I'm pretty proud the coding worked. I used [font color="#ffffff"]spoilertext[/font], with < > instead of [ ], of course.

Re: whiteout spoiler coding

Date: 2008-02-21 04:18 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] may7fic.livejournal.com
Thank-you for this. Of course I'm going to have to use this reply as a test post. Pure gibberish follows:



Thank-you again :)

Date: 2008-02-18 03:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rupertgsnum1fan.livejournal.com
I think a lack of sleep is keeping me from comprehending this fully, but it's written very creatively, that's for sure. I had a feeling/hope that it would end up being May 2nd that Dean and Sammy found each other or however it happened.

Is there gonna be a follow up? lol, I'm intrigued. :)

Date: 2008-02-19 07:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
I know, me writes confusingly...
I had a feeling/hope that it would end up being May 2nd that Dean and Sammy found each other or however it happened.
When not-quite-Dean-anymore lost control over its invisibility on April 28, the picture someone snapped got into the newspapers; that's when Sam knew there was something for him to look for.

I'm thinking about writing a follow-up that has Sam trying to deal with what's left of his brother.

Thank you for reading!

Date: 2008-02-18 06:24 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
Sounds like Dean's pretty messed up both physically and mentally but at least he somehow escaped hell and is back with Sam.

Yeah, I'm gonna have to go ahead and ask for a sequel here.

Date: 2008-02-19 07:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
There might be one, though probably not from Dean's point of view.
Thanks for reading!

Date: 2008-02-19 02:55 am (UTC)
ext_19671: Screencap of James T. Kirk from TOS episode "The Concscience of the King" with the caption "Why yes, I am that awesome." (Default)
From: [identity profile] paleogymnast.livejournal.com
I'm thinking I'm interpreting it right, that somehow after he escaped hell, the farther he got and the closer he got to Sammy (and Sammy's birthday), the more time he spent in the presence of things not found in hell (like rain and water) the more he healed and became real, substantial, visible, whole and came back to himself.

I love that Dean doesn't know his own name or really remember Sammy as a specific person, but as a concept... but when he finds Sammy (or Sammy finds him) it clicks and he gets at least Sammy's name and all the feelings of rightness and safety and happiness that come along with it.

Date: 2008-02-19 07:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mayachain.livejournal.com
*feels happy and relieved at your comment*

I'm thinking I'm interpreting it right
Mostly, except for the visibility thing - he didn't want to be seen and while he didn't quite know how he did it, he stayed invisible by choice.He would have stayed that way if not for the shock of falling down in the first instance and later losing hope of ever finding Sam.

I love that Dean doesn't know his own name or really remember Sammy as a specific person, but as a concept
Hell messed him up pretty bad. Being confronted with non-hell things helped nudge his memory a bit - seeing other humans: the basic shape; being frightened by the rain: of a size big enough to cover him, but it will take some time and a lot of effort from Sam's side to help him remember more than feelings and Sammy's name.

Thank you for reading!
- mayachain

Date: 2008-02-20 03:05 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] huntress69.livejournal.com
I was at part 11 before I got it, at least I think I did....Dean getting back to Sam, after literally going thru Hell...at least that was my impression (and it was after I finished reading that I peeked at other's comments and saw others felt the same)...and that last line of yours - A voice, rough and filled with tears and disbelief and young, and when its Sammy speaks its name, it feels warm and amazing and whole. - Pass the Kleenex...bawling in happiness....

Date: 2009-01-10 12:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] a-phoenixdragon.livejournal.com
Haunting and beautiful...
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